Conversare – reflections on the essence of conversation and on the growing recognition of how vital this is for our treating each other well

Some seminal thoughts on the underpinnings of ways of connecting well with each other, including with strangers.

Which are at the core of now increasing kinds of ways of people talking face to face about things that matter.

Conversation comes from the Latin con versare: to turn or to dance together. Does this appeal to you?

Here is a brief selection of ideas on the nature and significance of conversation:

“Creating a positive future begins in human conversation. The simplest and most powerful investment any member of a community or an organization may make in renewal is to begin talking with other people as though the answers mattered.”
From ‘Who Will Tell the People’ by William Greider

People of action often say, “Don’t just talk, get out there and do something”. Perhaps better advice is, “Don’t just do something, get out there and talk”. Willis Harman

“For it is a listener’s experience, yes the listener – the hearer – who determines the meaning of an utterance ….. The listener hears whatever he or she hears, and we never know what that is.” Pille Bunnell

The ‘keeper’ for me (from Alan Stewart’s presentation) was the wonderful notion that every time we talk openly with another human being, a third -joint-level of consciousness is created, from the best of both of us.  When we argue or debate, we actually seek to block the other’s contribution and limit potential solutions or suggestions, limiting world consciousness.  Catherine Palin-Brinkworth

When you listen to somebody else, whether you like it or not, what they say becomes a part of you …..the common pool is created, where people begin suspending their own opinions and listening to other peoples’…. At some point people begin recognizing that the common pool is more important than their separate pools.’ David Bohm

Conversation is a meeting of minds with different memories and habits. When minds meet, they don’t just exchange facts: they transform them, reshape them, draw different implications from them, engage in new trains of thought. Conversation doesn’t just reshuffle the cards: it creates new cards…
Theodore Zeldin

Author Kio Stark’s book When Strangers Meet: How People You Don’t Know Can Transform You is about her seven-year personal study of her interactions with strangers in New York City. She believes that reaching across the gulf of silence that normally stands between ourselves and the people we encounter on a daily basis is not just essential, but transformative.

Conversare

In these events, which are a novel kind of socialising , the main activity of participants is to engage in conversation with one other person, a stranger, over a fine meal. Being held in public places, anybody who wishes to join in is welcome.

A host welcomes everyone and provides guidelines (see …) on the nature of this kind of gathering – and when to choose your food and your meal time partner.

With ‘starter’ questions of their companion being such as “Who are you and what has attracted you to be here’? Everybody present does this, everyone is a full participant. There is ample opportunity to connect with others too.

Living Room Conversations

Respect. Relate. Connect.

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dedicated to connecting across divides.

Listen First Conversations

A Listen First Conversation is any conversation that prioritizes understanding. A Listen First Conversation might be between two friends or among many strangers. It might be on a park bench, in a classroom, in a workplace, at home, or online, Regardless of where you are or who you are with, here’s how to do it!

Top 10 Tips for Listen First Conversations. http://www.listenfirstproject.org/tips

Looking forward.

Go well

Al (formerly Alan) Stewart, PhD
Social Artist
Senior Fulbright Scholar
Facilitator of conversations that matter and participatory fun
Blog:  www.conversare.net

“Whenever we treat each other well good things happen”.
Al Stewart

And here’s a thought to stir your cockles:

“Be yourself. And be it well.”