Conversare reflections
This blog attracts numerous comments, as followers worldwide would likely appreciate.
While many are in foreign languages and in unreadable scripts there are quite a few ‘gems’ that surface every now and then.
Here are two received in the last few days:
A new comment on the post “An idea aching to be born” is waiting for your approval
http://conversare.net/an-idea-aching-to-be-born/ This was posted nearly nine years ago!
Comment:
Lovely just what I was looking for. Thanks to the author for taking his clock time on this one.
And in regard to this post, slightly edited:
Comment:
Ϝirst off I would like to say terrific blog! I had a qᥙick question that I’d ⅼike to ask if
you don’t mind. I was interested to know how you center
yourself and clear your head prior tօ writing. І’ve had a
hard time ⅽlearing my thoughts in getting my thoughts out.
I do take pleasure in writing but it juѕt seems lіke
the first 10 to 15 minutes are usualⅼy wastеd
јust trying to figure out how to begin. Any sᥙggestions or hints?
Fair question. <smile>
First of all I would say that it takes me ‘some time’ to clear my thoughts too. And yet once I settle into the writing – with firm intention to do this – ideas seem to flow. About which I make notes to come back to. And with this blog to produce sometimes a draft or two to review before posting.
Likely these happen for several ‘reasons’.
Inspired by what I have long acted upon after noting this years ago from the German poet Goethe:
“Whatever you can do, or dream you can … begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.”
Complemented by:
“… only begin and the mind grows heated; begin and the task will be completed.”
Given too are my increasingly strong feelings that I have something important to relate. Which could be of particular interest and value to others, all around our little planet, 3rd from the sun.
To do with a way in which people come together to have conversations with the core idea in mind that ‘We are here to treat each other well’. In the knowledge that everone present will be a full participant. With this underpinning whenever and wherever Conversare is offered in many and diverse public places/spaces.
For I have had wonderful experience in both inventing and developing this novel way of connecting among strangers. And from keeping going with putting this into practice in diverse places – and countries – ever since its beginning in Hong Kong some ten years ago.
Now doing this with several associates who provide fine support in various ways.
For Conversare (pronounced conversari) and named from the Latin: to turn or to dance together (Do you like this idea?) is essentially a social process, held in public places, in which anyone who wishes to participate is welcome. With a simple meal over which to converse, in pairs, among people who have not met previously. Or who do not know each other well.
Which is is purely to get to learn how each other experiences life, what interests and personal stories that each would wish to relate. Sometimes quite astonishing what people are happy to share.
With the emphasis being on the ‘carefulness’ with which participants interact with each other. Done in confidence just between each pair.
In these events there are two particular components:
One is the role of a trained host. This person welcomes everybody present, indicating at the outset that they are ‘the right people’. And after calling the gathering to order outlines the principles which underly what happens. See: Conversare – the host as social artist
And indicates what the participants are invited to ‘be’ and ‘do’. By these I mean:
The second component? Give your meal partner one of the greatest gifts you can to anyone.
Which is? Your full attention expressed as careful, non judgmental listening in a way that indicates your pleasure in connecting with your meal partner.
For now we have a social process in which everyone’s focus is on learning about other’s interests. Not, as in ‘networking’ meetings, to connect with the person(s) who could be most useful to you!
With a clear intent of putting core conversational skills into practice. Among which to bear in mind being “One of the most underrated skills is to let other people finish their sentences before starting yours.” Chris Bailey
On learning recently of the Conversare way of interacting the head of a large facilitators network in the USA noted:
“Very interesting work, Alan! I think you’re right that the timing is spot-on for Americans to have more semi-structured interpersonal conversations that aren’t necessarily political in nature.”
Related to this latter comment, Conversare is quite different from other kinds of ‘conversational meetings’ in which participants come together, in places such as private homes, to hear about what and how others hold particular political or or religious beliefs. Valuable as these are …
For there has been, in the past few years, a great upsurge of activities in this vein related to conversational events/approaches in the United States examples of which can be noted here under the ‘umbrella’ of the Listen First Coalition.
Among which is the forthcoming from 5-13 April 2019 April National Conversation Week
To add:
As you may see from what previous participants in events in the diverse places have reported in Feedback on Conversare they have been about ‘being interesting and enjoyable’. What has often been reported too is that “When I happen to meet later ‘in the street’ one of the participants in the event that I attended we have an immediate lovely connection. “
And this, perhaps the most ‘poignant’, from a participant in an event in Indonesia: “What I experienced was simple and deep, a spiritual adventure.”
To be touched on in a future post, all being well:
Could Conversare kind of socialising in diverse kinds of public spaces be a means to help reduce the vast levels of loneliness now being reported to be experienced among people living in cities? See here for starters.
Why participating in Conversare events could do much to transform ‘shyness’ into self confidence – and the great difference having better social skills can make to one’s life.
Do please feel welcome to contribute your thoughts and feelings on these matters offline or through Contact
Looking forward.
Go well
Al (formerly Alan) Stewart, PhD
Social Artist
Senior Fulbright Scholar
Facilitator of conversations that matter and participatory fun
Blog: www.conversare.net
“Whenever we treat each other well good things happen.”
Al Stewart
With this thought to stir your cockles:
“Be yourself. And be it well.”
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