What’s in it for participants?

June 30, 2012 |  by  |  Uncategorized

Conversare is for people who wish to open up their lives. People who recognise that these novel events are an exciting and intriguing way of doing this, whatever their stage of life.

What can happen when you come along to a social gathering in a public place for the specific purpose of having conversation? An event in which you may or may not know anyone present and in which the core activity is talking with one person who you have not met previously.

Does this sound risky to you? While it might at first sight you no doubt appreciate that there is no possibility of leading a life of fulfillment and adventure without some risk taking! Having a look at reports of previous participants may allay your fears.

What could ‘having a go!’ mean for you and how the world around you changes once you become a more ‘interested’ spirit and step out more confidently, as outlined below.

Here are just some of the possible experiences you may have during an event, and what you may also take away:

 .  An immediate feeling that this is a different and interesting way to get together. For you recognise that you are in a situation in which all are welcome and included and in which there is little judgment, no sense of there being ‘them and us,’ no matter who also has shown up.

.  Experience of wholesome connecting and having a highly enjoyable and satisfying time.

.  Being reminded that face-to-face conversation is the most enlivening and enriching way of connecting with others. And a nice change from communicating with a little screen in front of you and a little plug in your ear!

.  Something very tangible to reflect on afterwards and to start to implement in your own life. Also to share with others and perhaps invite one or more of these to come along.

.  An experience, in the moment, of enjoyable talking in greater depth than usual, in this instance with a stranger, as well as with others present.

.  Recognition that engaging with a stranger requires a different way of talking than with someone already known as there are no memories of joint experiences to draw on.

.  The joy of an encounter with an unknown person, from whose stories there was learning about ‘the other’ and also about ‘oneself’ plus recognition of much in common.

.  An opportunity to engage with people who may have different ethnicities, origins, interests, aspirations … People who in the course of your usual life you would not likely ever meet.

.  Enhanced awareness of what conversation is and why careful listening and careful questioning are so central to relating well with others. (Many people have little education in this art and little appreciation that it requires constant vigilance and constant practice to become and remain skilled).

.  Determination to ‘ginger up’ your people skills and to put these into practice with family members, friends, colleagues, neighbours, persons sitting next to you in a bus or plane …

.  The ability to recognise who are skilled conversationalists and what they do that indicates this.

.  Greater appreciation of what happens when people treat each other with respect – and when they don’t.

.  A reduced fear and anxiety about meeting new people.

.  A feeling of having the privilege of meeting with people purely for the joy of encounters with others who also represent humanity.

.  The knowing that if you subsequently happen to meet any of the people who were at the same event you will have a warm encounter.

(Said a participant: “A few weeks after that meeting I still remember the people there fondly and I know that if I see them again, in whatever the situation, I will be genuinely happy to see them.”)

.  Participants all receive a booklet entitled Time to converse – at the heart of human warmth by Alan Stewart, PhD. Numerous people have reported that they found this booklet to be of great value to them.

It is about what happens when we treat each other well in whatever we do.


. Those who come again, and again (as many did to the events in Hong Kong)  find that these experiences, insights and learnings are enhanced and deepened. And that they establish close friendships with like minded others.

.  There could be add-on happenings arranged by participants. For example a person who came from Melbourne specifically to experience an event in Adelaide recently brought a copy of the DVD The Journey of the Universe by Brian Swimme and Mary Evelyn Tucker. This led to a showing in a local community centre to which previous participants were invited, along with others.

Does being a participant still appear too risky to you?  <smile>

Let me know if you would wish for something similar to be set up in your neighbourhood anywhere on our little planet, 3rd from the sun. It could happen …

 Alan Stewart


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